At the risk of mimicking American politics (being redundant and unrelenting), and since there won’t be anything good on television until after the elections, I have yet another column on politics.

I know, it’s been done before.

So what? So have Paula Jones and Sherry Rowlands.

Do you think it’s true that our politicians act like children?

I can sure see why we would think that, given some of the events that go on in the name of campaigning. Mud-slinging comes to mind (name-calling for grown-ups).

How about illegally influencing voters, manipulating votes, espionage, collusion, strong-arm tactics and other assorted scandals?

What do these things have in common? What, or whom, do they make us think of?

Grown men in our political system? (Do we have any of these?)

What about some anarchistic college students at Iowa State’s mock election last Wednesday who ought to have known better than to interfere with the most precious of all American privileges?

Granted, this was only a mock election, but it’s unsettling. This kind of behavior implies “mock” principles and “mock” respect.

This kind of behavior isn’t amusing, and besides, it should be left to professionals.

If college students don’t know any better than to influence voters or falsify votes, perhaps they should retake the sixth grade.

Of course, things aren’t going so great there, either.

The same day as our ill-fated “election” here at ISU, I received a tip regarding improper conduct at an elementary school here in Ames.

Because I am conscious of the desires of my readership to keep informed, and because there isn’t anything good on television yet, I followed up on this lead.

It seems that at least one elementary school is using this election year as a vehicle to teach, by example, the magnificent specter of our political system. For those of you who might have missed it, last week I wrote about my unfortunate experience with the political system when I was in the sixth grade. (I was beaned with a billboard for Nixon.)

For those who thought it seemed a bit far-fetched to find political zealousness in the sixth grade, read on.

This school is constructing a council of students.

Positions for this council are available by election. Sixth-grade students may run for president. Fifth-graders may run for vice-president. Fourth, fifth and sixth-grade students may run for treasurer or representative.

The students elected will sit on a council and make decisions within these positions for the remainder of the school year.

Much like our own system at Iowa State, the hopefuls must obtain signatures to be considered for the ballot.They will campaign with posters, pins and speeches.

They will be elected by popular vote.

I interviewed two students involved with the process who told me there were problems developing.

The principal outlined specific rules of conduct and procedure for teachers and students.

However, one political hopeful was apparently misrepresenting petition sheets to gain signatures and had enlisted the aid of other students to do so. They had also established operatives within various campaign headquarters who were misappropriating campaign agendas, slogans and graphics.

One student I interviewed was a campaign staff member for another hopeful. He discovered evidence of these tactics and informed his pre-candidate.

They then confronted the alleged offender, at which time they were offered a bribe for their silence regarding the petition sheets. The group instead took the dilemma to their mediator (their teacher), who advised a meeting with the authority in charge of candidate selection (the principal).

The candidate under suspicion was offered the opportunity to step down, and the offer was accepted.

Another campaign staff member related that they were having problems with destruction of campaign materials (posters). Apparently, these were being relocated to the girls’ bathroom.

Yet another hopeful, unrelated to the other offenses, was accused of using intimidation tactics to solicit signatures and gain voter support.

This individual was also removed from the running.

Which came first, the chicken or the egg? Have grown people merely brought their attitudes and behaviors from childhood? Or, should we say that we know where the kids are getting it? How do we explain the actions of our peers on campus?

Aside from the relatively few instances of impropriety, however, these children are behaving better as a whole than the candidates who will run our country. As a group, they are taking this activity more seriously than some college students are. These sixth-graders are using words like ethics and integrity, and meaning them. They are discussing who has the trust of the students to represent the grades and not just their friends.

They may be remiss in tossing campaign posters in the girls’ lavatory (an idea I find rather appealing with regard to one or two presidential and senatorial candidates). Admirably, however, these children are not participating in one popular grown-up game: mud-slinging.

They have yet to call anybody a bozo.

Perhaps all presidential elections ought to have a principal in charge.

Thought for the day: I think we should vote just because it’s the only way we will get the candidates off television and out of the newspapers. – Audrae Jones.

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Audrae Jones is a senior in English from Clear Lake.