For many women, infertility is a curse to be dealt with privately. But Paulette Bates Alden decided to write about it.

“Writing allowed me to gain perspective on the situation,” Alden said. “It helped me work through my grief.”

Alden will be at Big Table Books Friday to give a reading of her memoirs, Crossing the Moon: A Journey Through Infertility.

“I didn’t want Crossing to only be about grief,” Alden said. “I wanted it to be a more lighthearted look. So, it was a challenge to create a persona that was both likable and funny in such a sad situation.”

In Crossing, Alden recounts her initial ambivalence about motherhood and the frustration of four years of infertility treatments. Ultimately, the book is about a birth: the writer Alden.

“I wrote a book of short stories a few years ago, but Crossing was a chance for me to be more authentic,” she said. “Writing a memoir gave me such a specific focus to my life. I was able to concentrate on my natural impulses and didn’t have to force the emotions.”

Professors of literature often claim there is an “anguished question” behind the premise of any book. Alden knows this is true for her.

“I wanted to know why I was a woman who didn’t have a child,” Alden said. “I was raised in the South where girls were told to be good wives and mothers. So how was I supposed to resolve not being a mother?”

Alden eventually found an answer. A respected professor of creative writing and comfortable with her family of two, Alden finally feels at peace.

“The grief isn’t pressuring me to write anymore,” Alden said. “Time is a great editor. I’ll write again when I have something else to say.”

Alden will be at Big Table Books Friday, Sept. 20 at 7:30 pm. The event is free and open to the public.