In the long standing tradition of good sports rivalries such as Iowa State-Iowa, Oklahoma-Nebraska, Celtics-Lakers, Yankees-Red Sox, 49er’s-Cowboys, Jim Walden-the city of Ames; the Iowa State Daily’s veteran volleyball team took on a young and inexperienced Alpha Gamma Rho volleyball squad Saturday morning at Brookside Park.

And lost — big time.

When I was asked by a member of the Pi Beta Phi sorority to compete in the Pi Beta Phi/Alpha Gamma Delta Dirty Open Mud Volleball Tournament this past weekend, I was excited at the staff’s chances.

I mean, you put a bunch of journalists in a giant mud puddle at 9:00 in the morning and sling it around at each other, they’ll feel right at home. Not to mention the fact that I consider myself to be a master mudbelt.

Little did I know then, we would be pitted up against the Aggers in the first round. These guys were even more at home in the mud than us — I reckon it must be the farming background (chores and such).

Our roster was impressive (read like Chris Berman):

* Tim “I’m no Troy” Davis: a 6-8 junior and opinion page editor; strengths are trash talking and arguing for no reason whatsoever.

* Chris Miller “Genuine Draft”: a 6-10 junior, head news editor and Wednesday sports columnist; strength is he lives in Farmhouse — knows mud well.

* Colleen “seedless water” Mullen: a 7 foot senior, university editor and former high school standout; strengths are her love of mud and she had friends that could fill the rest of our roster.

* Jason “there can be only one” Howlander: a 6-1 senior and sports editor; strength is he eats Wheaties every meal.

Needless to say, it was a close game. When the final whistle was blown, the Aggers were victorious, 12-0, 12-1.

High scorer for the Daily was “Genuine Draft” with a whopping one point in the second game. The Aggers were led by their server, Ace Ventura, who served straight through the first and most of the second game.

There were many reasons why our team didn’t win. First, it was a hybrid mud (part Sahara sand, part Minnesota manure). We had been practicing all week in just regular Iowa mud. Second, the Aggers cheated and lastly, the refs were paid off by the Interfraternity Council.

We were so bad, the organizers offered to let Davis and me join another team that was short some players, but they didn’t want us. Something about they’d rather play short a couple players than use us — oh, the irony of it all.

In all seriousness, we had a lot of fun and the tournament was for two good causes, the American Cancer Society and the Juvenile Diabetes Foundation. Even though we didn’t do well on the court, Davis won a brand new volleyball in a door prize drawing and all of us had fun dunking each other in that hybrid mud — my car still needs cleaning.

Phi Delta Theta was the overall winner after defeating “Genuine Draft’s” alma mater, Farmhouse, in the final game —damn that Interfraternity Council.

Hopefully more events like this will be held this year. They’re for good causes and most of all, they’re fun. I wonder whether a Daily team will be asked to come next time?

I just hope it’s not mud volleyball.

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Jason Howland is a senior in journalism from Riceville. He is the sports editor of the Daily.