I spend way too much time thinking about how lucky I am to work at the Iowa State Daily.

After a less-than-ideal freshman year of college where I hopped from major to major with no sense of direction, I landed on journalism.

My dad used to be a poet, and my mom used to work in marketing, so journalism felt like a happy medium between analytical and artistic — something that would let me be creative without making my parents too terribly concerned about my chances at a job. It felt right to at least try it out, but I didn’t think it would stick.

I was at a point in my life where I felt overwhelmingly lonely, and I joined the Daily entirely on an offhanded whim, thinking, at the very least, it would give me something to do with my time.

Through some insane miracle of happenstance, I knew from the very first minute I walked into the newsroom that it was where I was meant to be all along.

Before COVID-19, when we had access to our newsroom, it was pretty uncommon for reporters to spend time there outside of meeting with their editors. In the nine months I had worked as a reporter for the limelight section, I spent hours upon hours every single day in the newsroom. 

At first, it was just when I had stories to work on. Then, I started taking more stories every week just so I had an excuse to spend more time there. Eventually, I ditched the idea of needing an excuse and just started hanging out because these editors had finally gone from my intimidating superiors to my nearest and dearest friends.

I felt a bit like a burden, but I felt so alive for the first time in so long and never wanted to let go. I technically didn’t choose to become a journalist. It’s just kind of something that happened to me. Joining the Daily was exhilarating for this reason alone, but the fast-paced, highly important world of journalism had my head reeling in the best way possible.

I got to learn from a group of people who are like me — who have drive, a passion for words and a constant insatiable curiosity they aren’t completely sure what to do with. Getting inside their heads as we became closer, and learning why they love what they do, filled me with so much joy, and all I wanted to do was learn more from them.

I don’t know what I want to do with my life. I just love to learn. What I love most about the Daily is how we all help each other out and how open everybody is to trying new things.

I’ve written lighthearted reviews, deep personality profiles and even had the honor of covering the genesis of the 2020 Black Lives Matter protests in my hometown of Des Moines — something that was far beyond my comfort zone at the time but still an experience I wouldn’t trade for the world.

I owe it to my staff for always encouraging me to take those leaps.

Journalism hasn’t just taught me objectivity and fairness, but it has also taught courage. Courage is what I need right now. I still feel like I’m floating through life without much direction (who doesn’t?). It doesn’t bother me as much because I know I do important work, serve an important community and have important and inspiring people in my corner, no matter what.

I can’t imagine life without the friends I’ve made because of the Daily. My fellow journalists are who keep me motivated to challenge myself every day and retain that courage, no matter how hard things get.

All that time in the newsroom apparently paid off because I was hired as a managing editor after my ninth month of being a reporter. I really don’t feel like I deserve to be in this position, but nevertheless, I’m dedicated to giving back to the Daily because of the purpose and confidence it has given me. I’m obviously at a strange and confusing point in my life, but I’m honored to be a leader amidst the chaos.

Above all else, no matter where I go, I hope I never stop learning.