Why is there such a stigma around struggling with mental health?

Working over the summer at Iowa State with incoming students, we give them some time to get in a small group and ask any questions about coming here in the fall. This is one of my favorite sessions. The parents are in another room, so the students feel like they can ask me anything.

One question that really made me think was, “What was your biggest regret during your first year at Iowa State?”

I had never been asked a question that made me reflect like that.

I could have been answered really simply with a flippant response about not bringing enough hangers or having a lower grade-point average than I expected. Instead, I looked around my group and told them, “My biggest regret during my first semester was not taking care of my mental health.”

In college, you have the chance to have new and exciting experiences. Some are amazing, but some can hurt you.

Everyone talks about the dangers of walking alone at night or going to a party. However, the dangers of not getting help if you are feeling overwhelmed or alone is not stressed as much.

According to the National Alliance on Mental Illness, more than 75 percent of all mental health conditions begin before the age of 24. In high school, students might begin to experience conditions like depression and anxiety. However, many students have more support to rely on.

In college, on the other hand, you must essentially get used to a new life. It’s easy to find yourself overwhelmed, and there is an unfair stigma around seeking help for your mental health.

When you get an injury, you go to a doctor or to the hospital and don’t even think twice (if you have insurance and money for the copay). People see going to therapy as a sign of weakness, but you should never feel ashamed of it.

With how focused I’ve been on my studies, I saw every free moment as an opportunity to get ahead. I put school before my family, my friends and my mental health. You won’t realize the harm you are causing yourself until you reach your breaking point.

I told my group that they should care about school while also finding the balance that is right for them. You can be a great student and also have a social life through being involved in clubs and organizations you enjoy.

College students will often find themselves putting masks on when they go out or talk to friends and family. You don’t want to be seen as the downer friend or have your parents worry, and that is the biggest issue — the fear that once you change even a little from the first impressions you make, people will always comment about it.

Growing up, I was always known as happy and filled with energy. I was so afraid to break that impression, I was convinced that was my true self. However, that fear of negative perception can sow even more doubt and distress in your mind, increasing the magnitude of your struggles and creating a vicious cycle.

In reality, it is completely normal to feel blue on some days, or to avoid interacting with people on others. I encourage you to talk to your families and friends about these topics to foster more awareness. You might help them change their attitudes and perhaps even help them open up about any of their own mental struggles.