There are two types of people who tailgate at college football games.

The first kind is the settler; those people who have the same tailgate spot every week. They stay at, or very near, their tailgate all day unless they’re en route to the stadium. Settlers often host friends and visitors at their tailgates.

The second kind of people at college football games are the nomads; people who walk all over the place, stopping at tailgates even if they don’t know anyone there. For nomads, the fun of tailgating is walking around and taking in the atmosphere around the stadium.

Settlers

Settlers are great. If you’re walking around and look a little lost, settlers will often offer you a drink — regardless of your age — and help you find where to go. They may offer a burger, brat, or other delicious food as a sign of welcome.

The best way to get a ton of food and drinks at football games is pretty easy. Simply walk through the tailgating lots outside of Jack Trice Stadium and talk to everyone you meet. For some reason, 98.5 percent of college football tailgaters have a great abundance of meat and alcohol and they would love to give it away to as many passerby as possible.

Nomads

Nomads are easy to spot — at least, the smart ones are easy to spot. A smart nomad will be fashionably wearing a pair of cargo shorts. Cargo shorts are essential for the nomadic lifestyle of college football tailgating because a solid pair of cargo shorts can easily carry extra canned beverages.

If you see someone carrying a cooler full of drinks, they’re either a settler or a terrible nomad; no experienced tailgating nomad would ever travel with a cooler that doesn’t roll on at least two wheels.

Your friend that leaves your tailgate after 10 minutes because their old high school buddy is having a tailgate and they promise to be back in half an hour (but you don’t see them again all day) is a nomad.

The Perfect Tailgate

Tailgating is all about people. The good news is that there will be more than 60,000 people at the first football game this year, and almost every single one will be in a good mood.

Tailgating, however, can also get dull if you don’t prepare. Make sure to bring the following.

• Drinks
• Food
• A tent or some other kind of sun protection
• Drinks
• Sunscreen
• Team apparel
• Drinks
• A bottle opener
• A football
• Drinks
• Music and some kind of speaker
• A trash bag
• Drinks

Now that you have some of the basics for a college football tailgate, it’s time to freak out, because you definitely forgot seven different things and Hy-Vee is super busy on gamedays, so good luck finding what you want and getting to the stadium on time.

But really, tailgating is all about having fun. If you’re not having a great time while tailgating, you’re tailgating wrong.