A few nights ago, when the Iowa State men’s basketball team hosted the Golden Lions of Arkansas Pine-Bluff, I was sitting in the balcony, a few rows down from a bunch of guys who were among the worst fans ever known.

These guys are turning Hilton magic into a farce! Why? They don’t rise for our fight song, they don’t cheer when it’s needed most and they heckle our own players.

Case in point: Tony Rampton. These guys would not lay off Tony. When he came into the game, they booed. When he committed a foul, these guys cheered. They kept shouting loud requests for him to be taken out of the game. When he was, they erupted with sounds of pleasure. And Tony, on the bench, buried his face in a towel.

Leave the guy alone, for God’s sake! He tries hard and is a solid inside player. He was a capable backup to Kelvin Cato, and he is fighting through injuries right now. He may not always be the best big guy on the floor, but I guarantee you he is the guy who tries the hardest.

Also, cheer when your team needs you, not just when it has already built up a 20-point lead. I mean, when the game is close, get off your butt and shout! Distract the other team when they shoot free throws and make noise when they bring the ball up the floor. We don’t need the place to be rocking when we’re routing the team, but when the game is still competitive, we certainly do.

With this in mind, and the Iowa basketball games coming up, we need some real guidelines for being fans. If all of us abide by them this weekend, I guarantee we will come out with a sweep.

1. Don’t come out of the weekend with your voice intact. It’s finals week anyway, so you won’t need it.

2. Be at all the games. And shout very, very loudly.

3. Shout good things, like “Overrated, (clap, clap, clap-clap-clap)” or “Let’s Go Cyclones, (clap, clap, clap-clap-clap),” not things critical of the Cyclones. Hey, I’ve heard them.

4. Appreciate Tim Floyd at every juncture. He is the greatest college coach in the country, bar none.

5. When you hear the fight song, stand and clap. Don’t sit around and look clueless. Don’t go and get ice cream or whatever. Make as much noise as possible.

6. Wear your cardinal and gold. Let’s not let it be like the football game where the T.V. guys were showing screaming legions of Hawkeye fans.

7. Did I mention being at the women’s game? Let’s sell Hilton out two hoops games and a wrestling meet in a row!

8. Make sure Ricky Davis and Dean Oliver learn what big-time college basketball is about. Pressure, stress and not being able to hear yourself think.

9. Give hell to Herky!

10. Harass the Hawkeyes men’s basketball team. No, just kidding. Though they are ranked No.10, we will win. And win big in all three matches.

The women’s game should be the biggest Cyclone win of the series, the men’s a most impressive victory and the wrestling team will finally break the streak.

Go Cyclones!

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Jayadev Athreya is a sophomore in mathematics from Ames.