Top reasons to stay in college as long as you possibly can
August 4, 2010
- Going back to school pushes your student loan payments back
another year.
- Joining the work force means facing a terrible job market.
- College is the only “job” where you can sleep in until
noon.
- Not returning automatically garners you the title of
“townie.”
- Admit it, your work load in college is easier than digging
ditches.
- When you wake up drunk and crack another beer, in the real
world it’s a sign of alcoholism, but in college it just means there
was a football game.
- In college you get to write teacher reviews, in the real world
no one cares if you don’t like your boss.
- The walk of shame grows much more humiliating when you can’t
chalk it up to your college lifestyle.
- In college you don’t have to hide your tattoos or piercings,
and you can mohawk your hair and die it crazy colors.
- College is the last oasis for people that need sports to
actually matter in their lives; after this you’ll just be another
rabid fan at the bar.
- In the real world you are not allowed to throw away dishes just
because you are too lazy to wash them.
- Looking in the police blotter and finding your friends is not
cool after college.
- No one will be sensitive to your feelings when making
fraternity jokes outside of Ames.
- Where else can you be assured that you will be getting a ticket
or towed when you park.
- Being super obsessed with someone after a few dates is love in
college; in the real world, it’s called stalking.
- Acting like a jerk at the bar will only get you weird looks in
a college town, but in bigger, less forgiving places it will get
you thrown out.
- Where else but college can you ask your parents for food and
not look like a complete loser.
