For the life of me, I have absolutely nothing to talk about.

Shocking, I know.

Rest assured we’re plenty pissed with the antics of House Republicans both here and in Washington D.C., what, with the “deficit-reduction” aimed at piddly things like, oh, public education, as opposed to something like, I don’t know, not conducting a land war in a mountain range halfway around the world.

That is, when they’re not treating ‘the gays’ like second-class citizens, crying wolf about the integrity of a practice that, at best, is a good way to never have sex again and at worst, is a great way to lose half of your earthly possessions (and your soul) to someone who hates you. In this economy, no less.

Moral of the story: This is what happens when Grandma and Grandpa vote, and you don’t.

But hey, that’s alright – no need for things like preschool or affordable college during a budget crisis. More ethanol subsidies! More swanky benefits for government employees!

I suppose I could mention how we’re still taking applications for the Editorial Board, and how by “applications'” I mean a nice, shiny e-mail telling me you’d like to be opinionated in board-y fashion.

It’d definitely be nice if there were more than five people on the Board, and even nicer if the majority wasn’t Daily staff.

I hope everyone’s been enjoying the section. I’ve been wearing my editor pants for almost two months now, and it’s been great hiring new people to complement a pretty solid stable of writers.

I’m always looking for those, by the way. The only thing I ask is that you’re interesting and mildly articulate. Perendinate. Assuade. Caesura.

No, you don’t need to be a journalist, nor do you need to be a writer. I’m one of two biology majors on staff, there’s a KURE DJ, an Aussie, a few engineers and I just hired a rocket scientist.

If you’ve noticed the snazzy new art, that’s thanks to three new illustrators, which is three more than we had last semester. If you’re artistically inclined, I promise we’ve got more than enough work to commission – Rick’s story about IBM slowly turning into Skynet over there could most definitely have used some animated robot overlords.

I’d like to apologize for a few things while you’re still here – letters have taken a backseat lately while we’re busy opining about the protests here, there, and everywhere. Rest assured, we want to hear from you. We need to. On average, I get two pages per day, and most days I wish I had more. Keep ‘em comin’.

Lastly, I’ve instituted a moratorium on shmishmortion-related columns.

Indefinitely.

Enjoy your adventure. I am.