I have a secret. I suppose, like everyone, I actually have a bunch of secrets, but don’t get greedy, I’m only going to tell you one.

Life is interesting, because the paths we choose, especially at a fork in the road, can make all the difference.

Cue Robert Frost.

My path to graduation next week is not one that I hope anyone else takes.

I started my college career in 1992, about the time that many people in my current classes were born. When I got to school, I was an immature punk, who suddenly had all the restraints of home life torn off his adHd fueled brain (Hint: That “H” is capitalized for a reason). I spent a good portion of my first two-and-a-half years playing video games, exploring this awesome new Internet thing on campus, and my most favorite activity of all … skipping class.

I’ve always been a capable student, and most people in my high school class would probably be pretty surprised that I’m just now finishing my undergrad. But the fact is, the first time around, I wasted my talent and drove my life so far off-course that it’s only God’s grace that allowed me get back on track.

I flunked out of Iowa State in 1995.  I came back after a semester off and got good grades for one semester. The following semester I got a 1.92, which got me kicked out of school for the second time. (In 1997, you were on probation for two semesters if you ever got academically dismissed, and had to maintain a lowly 2.0 both semesters)

After I got kicked out for the second time, reality kicked in. It was time for me to grow up. Amazingly, I got married to the best ISU alumnus in the entire world and got a union job in Des Moines. In 2000, I started working for a couple of wonderful and generous Ames business guys, and worked for them for almost 10 years.

But what I was doing was not what I wanted to do and not what I was built to do. However, due to my previous path, I had little choice. I should have been working in drug rehab or family counseling 15 years ago, but here I am, trying to start my life over at 36 (although a fellow student pegged me at 24!).

I know that many of you are in the same situation I was 15 years ago. You might be academically dismissed in a few weeks, or placed on probation. And there will be people out in the world wishing they could travel back to, and scream at, their 18-year-old self to study hard, not skip class, graduate with honors and enter a field that they will enjoy.

Enjoyment of your life is so important, and what you decide to do now will have an everlasting impact on what you do at 30, 50, 70 and beyond. If you are stressed and unhappy, you are going to complain. If you complain, your spouse will be burdened, your friends will be burdened and your kids will be burdened. You will divorce. You won’t be as healthy. Life will not be enjoyable. Don’t waste your life chasing something you don’t want.

As the aforementioned Mr. Frost stated in the early 20th century:

“Two roads diverged in a wood, and I,

I took the one less traveled by,

And that has made all the difference.”

Do something. Be something. Encourage someone. Find joy.

Don’t make the same mistakes that I made my first time around at Iowa State; mistakes that have been purposely kept secret for nearly 15 years.

One last thing: Please don’t tell anyone.