Satire: BREAKING: Cy found dead. Beaten to death by fans


Gone but never forgotten. RIP Cy

Omar Waheed

Fed up with another upsetting loss, Iowa State fans took their rage out on Cy.

Found beaten to death behind the stadium, Cy was viciously attacked by fans of Iowa State. Following the loss from West Virginia, fans have channeled their dissatisfaction through violently attacking the beloved mascot.

“That damn bird,” said by one fan when asked about how they felt. “The mascot doesn’t even make sense. It’s not even the state bird or an actual cyclone.”

Disheartening to see the fans turn so quickly on the symbol of Iowa State, the pressure is on for Iowa State to secure more wins.

Seeking a new replacement for someone else to dawn the suit, Iowa State is having trouble finding anyone else to wear the costume after the tragic assault. When asked about the effect on morale of the team, Coach Matt Campbell did not get back.