We live in a society dominated by rape culture. Victims are often asked questions such as “What were you wearing?” and “How much did you have to drink?” when reporting cases of sexual assault. These leading questions can make the victim feel as if they are in part at fault for the horrible crime committed upon them.

“Victim blaming” is the act of putting the blame for a crime on the victim, saying they are in part responsible for what happened to them. In terms of sexual assault, victim blaming takes the form of a dangerous and slippery slope that keeps both women and men from coming forward about the crimes committed against them. Perpetrators of rape are often repeat offenders, meaning, if a victim fails to come forward, that can leave their assailant at large and other victims-to-be as prey.

Every 98 seconds, someone in America is sexually assaulted, and 1 in every 6 women will fall victim to sexual assault, according to the Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network. It’s fair to say that this issue is an epidemic.

So why do we warn women against going out alone, suggest they stick to the safe side of town and to not show too much skin? Why have we invented nail polishes that determine whether a drink has been spiked, instead of focusing on teaching people not to spike drinks?

Teaching women to “be safe” and try to avoid unsafe situations also leads to the incorrect assumption that sexual assault and violence are easily and straightforwardly preventable. Therefore, when these terrible crimes do occur, the victim feels as if they could have done something to prevent it. This can lead victims to inwardly blaming themselves for the crime committed against them.

Jokes about rape are part of the problem. “It isn’t rape if you liked it.” Not funny. This kind of talk only desensitizes the act and culture of rape when it should be treated as a horrendous and vulgar act. We should not be lightheartedly teasing “Rape!” when we are being playfully tickled or tackled. This demeans what it means to be assaulted, makes a joke out of the horrible nature of the crime and leaves victims of sexual assault feeling as if their story is a joke as well.

Living on a college campus, sexual assault prevention and warnings are everywhere. I can’t begin to tell you how many times I’ve been told to be careful when going out simply because I’m a woman. Yes, as a woman it is important to be weary about the potential dangers out there, but at the same time, men should also be aware of the situations they’re in and how their actions might appear as well.

Time and time again, we hear about sexual assault stories in the news where the perpetrator is painted as the victim of a bad night gone wrong. Just take a look at Brock Turner, of Stanford University. He was charged with raping an unconscious woman while intoxicated. He then blamed alcohol for his actions.

Turner was sentenced to six months prison time. The charges he faced had a maximum 14-year sentence. He only served three months of his time.

His father went on to say that his son’s life had been ruined because of “20 minutes of action”. What about the innocent victim whose life was forever changed for the worse?

There are many cases that paint a similar picture to this one. It is unfortunate but true that this is the world we live in. The truth is we cannot continue in this way as a society. Unless we can begin to educate men and women on how to handle themselves in instances where alcohol and temptation are present, instead of simply encouraging victims to stay safe, we cannot get anywhere with this problem.