Rock goes down to hell

Kyle Moss

Chris Rock is funny, and there is no doubt about that. But Rock’s attempt at writing “Down to Earth” is no laughing matter. In fact, one who is a huge fan of Rock and concerned for his future might want to see this movie a thousand times so it doesn’t flop at the box office.”Down to Earth” is based on 1941s “Here Comes Mr. Jordan” and 1978’s “Heaven Can Wait,” which starred Warren Beatty. But Rock’s version dabbles more into racial issues, but does so poorly.In doing a movie that is so blatantly unreal and unfunny, Rock seems to be rolling down the same path to career destruction that Eddie Murphy and Martin Lawrence have paved in recent years.This situation raises the question of what is more important between comedic reputation and a career, since “Big Momma’s House” did decent at the box office, but pretty much destroyed Lawrence’s comedic reputation.Fortunately for Rock, “Down to Earth” is slightly more tolerable than Lawrence dressed as a 400-plus-pound woman.The film tells the story of struggling comedian Lance Barton (Rock), whose life changes dramatically when it is prematurely taken.To fix the heaven mistake, Lance is offered a new body and he makes a split-second decision, ending up in the body of a fat, white man just because he has the opportunity to get close to a woman — a skinny black female named Sontee (Regina King, “Jerry Maguire”).The movie’s biggest distraction is that Rock sees himself as Lance, and the audience sees Lance, but the other characters in the movie see Rock as the fat white guy, Charles Wellington.Throughout the rest of the movie, one must keep it in mind that this isn’t Chris Rock, rather it is this other guy. The only time that Wellington is shown to the audience is when he is trying to be down with hip-hop.You can only imagine how not funny this is.The only somewhat humorous situation is when Rock is reciting the lyrics to a DMX song, which includes numerous n-words, and when he gets his ass kicked.When Sontee begins to fall in love with Wellington is when it’s time to take that bathroom break you always want to take, but don’t want to take fearing you’ll miss something good.Sure one of the main points of the film is to show that color shouldn’t matter in relationships and all that, but come on. This Wellington guy went from her worst enemy to the love of her life.Not to mention Wellington is married, listens to rap music and is pursuing a comedy career. Wouldn’t all this be just a little hard for Sontee to handle?Put all of these unbelievable storylines aside, and you still have the confusion of how Barton/Wellington is all of a sudden funny — and whether he is a businessman or a comedian.To add more confusing conflict, the guys from heaven decide it is time for Barton to give up Wellington’s body and find a permanent replacement — the day Barton/Wellington proposes to Sontee.The acting in “Down to Earth” is nothing special. Rock is fun to watch and ignites every scene he is in with his energy, even if the scene doesn’t have much going for it. But it’s not supposed to be Rock igniting the scene, so it’s almost hard to laugh at him knowing he supposed to be someone else.This movie would be nothing with any other person in the lead. Rock is one of the funniest people in the world right now, and him playing a struggling comedian and doing some typical Rock stand up is what gives this movie its only legitimate laughs.Rock is definitely good at accenting movies and taking his roles to the next level. This is evident in movies such as “Lethal Weapon 4” and “New Jack City.” But to star in his own film that is supposed to be taken with some seriousness such as this, requires a much better script so the bad aspects of the movie don’t take away from the humor Rock brings to the screen.If “Down to Earth” is any indication of where Rock’s movie career is headed, comedy is in some big trouble. If Rock takes one more step down the ladder of comedy films, he’ll walk right into “Big Momma’s House 2.”* and 1/2